July 25, 2018

Don’t manage stress, just manage yourself!

no stress copy

Oh stress!  Globally, organizations together lose a fortune every year on stress management training. Everyone seems to be talking about how to manage it, for stress levels are indeed skyrocketing. And yet such a myth stress management is !

We don’t need to manage stress. We only need to manage ourselves – our responses to the perceived stressors – whatever they be. We only need to break free ! From the mind’s own negativity.

Understand your life to be like a room and stress is like darkness. So what do you do when the room is dark ? Do you struggle to manage or drive off darkness?  No, you just light a lamp.

We don’t need to manage the darkness of stress in the house of our lives. We only need to light the inner lamps of love, self-motivation, joy, empathy, service, etc.

Love is not just for the people we live with but also for oneself, for those we work with, and we must also love the work itself that we do, and the customers we work for….

All motivation is eventually self-motivation ; others can inspire you to do that. Self-motivation is motivating your lower self of ego-mind-body complex with the joie de vivre and the wisdom of your soul – your Higher Self.

Joy is in fact the soul’s innate nature. In Sanskrit, we say soul is the image of Sat-Chit-Anand : Truth-Consciousness-Bliss.

See the kids walking – they are too spirited to walk simply ; they run, they jump and they hop and they dance ! Such zest for life, for existence itself !

Joie De Vivre : As we grow we lose this inner zest for life, this inner fire of motivation. It is because of the negativity of a separative ego and the ignorance of our essence as a soul.

Meditation is the best way to reconnect with Self, and to resurrect our soul-consciousness. Regular exercise and mindful living will also help a lot.

Just Manage Yourself, not Stress : So next time you feel stressed, focus not on managing the stress but on managing yourself – your ego, your emotive reactions, your unnecessarily strong likes and dislikes, your perceptions and attitudes, your moods.

We strengthen what we focus on : When we focus on managing stress, we make our stress worse – we bring in more darkness through worry and anxiety which is not our aim. We should be conscious of that which can mitigate and delete all stress – the positive attributes and inner resources which are always within us. We should focus on this innate positivity which is our very own.

Light the inner lamps ! Remember, 90% of our stress is not in what happens to us, but how we choose to respond to what happens.

Two Options : We have two choices whenever something gets difficult. We can react with egoistic emotions of like and dislike, with an attitude of judging and labeling others, we can ask ‘Why it happened to me ?’

Or we can respond proactively. We can look for where we erred, and how we can correct it. We can find out ‘What can I do next to fix it ?’

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About Hans Dholakia

Hans Dholakia

To Hans, life is a pilgrimage - a journey in consciousness through different role plays for discovering and realizing Self. A Chem.Engineer with over 43 yrs'​ experience, first in Mktg.(ending at Dir./VP levels) and then in Training, Hans is also a poet in 3 languages. His passion is blending neurosciences/modern management thinking with universal spiritual values and yoga-meditation, to help people realize their potential by taking charge of themselves. He is a long-time Kriyaban disciple of Sri Paramahansa Yogananda (a globally-revered saint who authored the life-transforming spiritual classic 'Autobiography of a Yogi'​). A family man with two sons and a grand-daughter, Hans believes in balanced living - experiencing life in its fullness, beauty and joy. Through service,right conduct and daily Kriya meditation, he seeks Spirit as the Highest Potential of himself and all alike, under divine guidance of his beloved Guru.

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